Competition 2013:  Fast and Furious

Competition 2013:  Fast and Furious

by Marc Zingarelli, EMSCI #179/SCI #002
Circleville (OH) Fire Department
IPMBA Treasurer

This year IPMBA returned to Baton Rouge and our hosts showed us once again that they not only know how to put on a conference but also a fast-paced competition.  The course once again was constructed on the Mississippi River levee but it had some new and interesting twists.  From the uphill start to a ladder-like obstacle, from the fast straight away to the obstacles at the end, this race had many surprises which included a showdown between EMS and Police and proof that that youth doesn’t necessarily make you a better rider.

The event had incredibly creative introductions and announcements by “DJ Crackbaby” (aka Kyle Callihan) who managed to be accurate about two percent of the time:  He basically got their name and department pronounced correctly – the rest of his spiel was off the cuff and highly comical.  The capacity crowd of public safety personnel and their families was supplemented by the passersby going to and from the live outdoor music event across the street.  The course even proved challenging to the senior tourists who disembarked from their tour bus and had to maneuver around and through the course to safely board the paddle boat and continue down the river.

Kicking off the event again this year was Shaums March, who dazzled the spectators with a warp speed time of 01:03.56. 

Perennial favorite Jason Schiffer of Team 21 Hours to Get Here (the drive time from Bethlehem to Baton Rouge) looked like the victor apparent through most of this race with his time of 1:14.91, but he was defeated in the last heats when Mike Hudspeth of Team Hypoxic captured the coveted blue ribbon with a time of 01:14.87 – a scant .04 second separation!  As the top two winners overall and in the Male 40-49 Category, Jason and Mike are both living proof that 40 is the new 20! 

Also proving that age isn’t a factor, Mike Harris came in at 1:17.82 (fourth overall in the Public Safety Category; edged out of third place by Scott Bixby’s 1:15.50) in the Male 50+ division.  He was followed by Paul LeFort with a respectable 1:28.97. 

Amongst Males 30-39, Charles Knapp snagged first place at 1:21.84, followed by Bobby Sellers with a time of 1:32.72.  Males under 30 were lead by Joshua Rymon with 01:37.16 and Christopher Timmer with 01:41.15.  At 02:17.88, Rebecca Carlile took Females 30+, while Eric Kackley of Volcanic Bicycles dominated the Open Category with a time of 01:19.00. 

Top team honors went to Team Cincy +1 which had a combined time of 06:15.12.  Team 21 Hours to Get Here was close behind with a time of 06:15.48.  The yellow ribbons went home with Team SAPD, 6:16.43. 

Medals were presented during the Awards Ceremony held at the LSU Stadium Club at Tiger Stadium.  Attendees feasted on barbecue favorites while listening to the tunes and banter of DJ Crackbaby and enjoying the views of downtown and, of course, the football field.  Clarence “Pops” Kalomeris (father of instructor Ron) was the lucky winner of the Smith & Wesson AR-15 upper, the BAMF bike went to Ryan Hopkins of East Baton Rouge EMS, and the Safariland patrol bike found its way to BWI Airport in the hands of Wayne Vernon.  Colby Lalli and Lisa Taube were the happy recipients of $50 gift certificates from Bratwear. 

Congratulations to the nearly 50 riders who conquered the course. We hope to see everyone next year in Tampa.  Hopefully some more records will be broken!

2013 Competition Results


Female 30+
Rebecca Carlile – 2:17.88, Cypress Creek (TX) EMS

Male under 30
Joshua Rymon – 01:37.16, Bethlehem (PA) Police Department
Christopher Timmer – 1:41.15, San Antonio (TX) Police Department

Male 30-39
Charles Knapp – 1:21.84, Cincinnati (OH) Police Division
Bobby Sellers – 1:32.72, Cypress Creek (TX) EMS

Male 40-49
Mike Hudspeth – 1:14.87 **First Overall, Public Safety Category**
Guilford County (NC) Emergency Services
Jason Schiffer – 1:14.91 **Second Overall, Public Safety Category**
Bethlehem (PA) Police Department

Male 50+
Mike Harris – 1:17.82, Mill Creek (WA) Police Department
Paul Lefort – 1:28.97, LaFourche (LA) Parish Sheriffs Department


Cincy + 1 – 6:15.12
Evan Coward, Asheville (NC) Police Department – 01:34.50
Alex Hasse, Cincinnati (OH) Police Department – 01:36.44
John Heine, Cincinnati (OH) Police Department – 01:42.34
Charles Knapp, Cincinnati (OH) Police Department – 01:21.84

21 Hours to Get Here – 6:15.48
Eric Kaintz, Bethlehem (PA) Police Department – 01:55.56
Jon Pesesko, Bethlehem (PA) Police Department – 01:27.85
Joshua Rymon, Bethlehem (PA) Police Department – 01:37.16
Jason Schiffer, Bethlehem (PA) Police Department – 01:14.91

SAPD (San Antonio Police Department) – 6:16.43
Steve Beilstein, San Antonio Police Department – 01:28.22
Tim Garcia, San Antonio Police Department – 01:31.72
Hank Quiroga, San Antonio Police Department – 01:35.34
Christopher Timmer, San Antonio Police Department – 01:41.15


Eric Kackley (Volcanic Bicycles) –1:19.00


Shaums March – 1:03.56

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